Breaking Inside
by xXThe AnomalyXx
Summary: It's my first fanfic so please read and review. Slight OOC at first with severe OOC later on. What happens when Kyon falls for Haruhi and all of his efforts to win her over end in vain? The man breaks inside...
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **It's my first fanfic so tell me if I'm doing anything wrong. This story is partly based on my own personal experiences and has some slight OOC at first which might change later. With that said enjoy reading!

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**Chapter 1: **First Steps to Failure

The feeling of knowing you could never have something you want was a feeling I have felt far too often. You could have said that feeling and I were good acquaintances. Looking back, I remembered the days where I first met this feeling and all of the bitter memories that came with it.

It all started a few months ago. It was rainy summer afternoon in the SOS clubroom. An unexpected storm had rolled in and cancelled the plans for the week. Not surprisingly, Haruhi wasn't quite fond of the sudden change in weather. Her angered mood of the day caused everyone to keep to themselves. The room was far quieter than usual. Sitting in my usual spot on the table I stared out of the window and gazed at the rain. Steam arose from the streets as it was still quite hot. Around the room not much was going on. Nagato was engaged into a book, Koizumi was missing today which made the place even quieter than on a usual slow day and Mikuru was busy heating up some tea in the corner. As I looked slightly to the left Haruhi was asleep on the computer. Her eyes nearly covered by her beautiful brown hair.

I couldn't deny the fact I thought she was beautiful. Her looks and eccentric personality is what caused me to talk to her for the first time and I have always had some feelings for her.

"I wonder what she honestly thinks of me", I thought to myself. "Does she see me as just another one of her club members or perhaps something more?"

These questions ran through my head as I spaced out gazing into the pouring rain. The sound and the sight lured me into a state of half awareness drifting towards sleep.

"Would you like some tea?" Mikuru suddenly asked me. I gasped quietly as I was shaken back into awareness.

"No, I'll pass for now" I replied. "Not in the mood to drink anything right now".

"Is there something wrong?" she asked me. I looked at her and saw a look of worry on her face.

"No, nothings wrong" I answered. "I'm just tired and have something on my mind" I added.

"Whats on your mind?" she asked. "It's nothing. Really it's not worth mentioning" I lied. I couldn't tell her how I was falling for Haruhi. I was far too shy to admit something like this and I feared for a possible fallout. I didn't want to risk her telling Haruhi at all and I tried to keep my personal life private to the rest of the members of this club.

"Well alright then, I'll just sit this aside for now incase you want some later" the girl replied.

I glanced at the clock and saw it was slightly after 4 in the afternoon. We usually departed at half past 4 but with Haruhi still asleep I didn't want to risk any punishment for leaving without her permission. As I started to go back into my state of half awareness I thought of a dream I had before.

"Damn was that really just a dream?" I thought. "Of course it was. Get a hold of yourself you never kissed her before" I had to sadly remind myself. It felt so real though that I couldn't help but believe that it truly happened. I wished that it wasn't one but alas, it was just a figment of my imagination.

I slowly began to doze off without even realizing it. Little did I know my little nap wasn't so little after all.

"Get up cmon" I was slowly shaken and my eyes slowly opened. "Cmon Kyon its already 7 at night, it's time to go!" My eyes opened completely and saw it was Haruhi who had awoken me.

"I was asleep that long?!" I exclaimed. "I did the same don't worry about it. I only woke up about 10 minutes ago as well. Guess these slow summer afternoons are perfect for taking a well needed nap" the beautiful girl in front of me said.

Everyone had left hours ago leaving just Haruhi and I alone in the clubroom. I couldn't help but get slightly excited at the fact it was just the two of us. I looked outside and I noticed the raindrops were still sliding across the window.

"Here I brought an umbrella. I noticed you forgot yours so would you like me to take you home?" I asked. "I don't care. But sure if you are willing to." She replied coldly. My heart sunk a bit at how her response sounded so cruel. She failed to acknowledge my kindness and repay it with some of her own but at least we would be able to walk home together.

As we walked out of the schoolhouse I opened the umbrella and held it close to her. I attempted to make conversation with her. It was rare where it was just the two of us and I can finally make a personal connection.

"Had a nice nap?" I couldn't help but ask. "Of course moron, who doesn't enjoy a nap on a slow day?" she said. "Oh true. I wouldn't know of anyone who doesn't enjoy one." I replied trying to keep an upbeat attitude.

We passed through the city streets which was soaked. The whole city seemed as if it was on mute except for the rain. The streets were barren and it was like everyone decided to stay at home except for the two of us. When we finally arrived at her house I bid her goodbye.

"If you are late tomorrow I'm giving you a penalty" she said as she closed the door. I couldn't even get a goodbye from her. As I walked home I thought about how she was responding to my acts of kindness and I felt a slight sting in my heart.

I finally arrived to my house and went straight to my room. After eating dinner and watching some TV I decided it was probably best to head off to sleep. I lied awake in my dark room and looked up at the ceiling. I whispered a question to myself and tried to find an answer to no avail.

"Haruhi….what am I doing wrong?" the lack of a positive response from everything I tried made me wonder and think until eventually, I finally drifted off to sleep.

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**A/N: **Well first chapter is done. Please leave some reviews and hope someone out there likes this. Until next time then!


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Tell me if this chapter is too short. If you all feel it is Ill merge it with the next chapter. Just a heads up the OOC in this one is off the charts.  
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"Leave me the hell alone you spineless, pathetic bastard!" She yelled out.

"Haruhi I'm sorry for eve-"

"Just shut your damn mouth and get out of my sight. I don't want to hear anything you have to say!" She said with a cold, heartless, in a far lower tone voice. "In fact, I never want to hear your voice ever again. I hate you. I hate everything about you." She continued. Each of her words containing more anger than the last.

"The only reason why we were friends was because you were so willing to do anything I say. You were such a perfect tool I'm going to show you the only thing you deserve in your pathetic life." She finished her ever growing louder sentence. Her eyes glowed in madness as she reached into her pocket and pulled out a pistol.

"You want to know what you deserve?! You deserve to burn in hell forever!" The brown hair girl screamed as she pointed it at me and pulled the trigger.

I woke up panting and sweating. I grabbed onto my chest and frantically tried to catch my breath. It felt as if a heavy weight was just droped onto my chest repeatedly. Now I never really experience nightmares. I knew they were nothing to ever worry about. They are just a dream gone awry and a figment of your imagination. Surely they can't be real right? I mean nightmares are about as real as fairy tales and the tooth fairy! If that was the case why did it feel so real? Anyway, what am I saying? Get a grip on yourself Kyon it's not real! After all if she did shoot you why in the hell are you still here thinking?

As I looked around my room I realized how alone I truly felt. My dark empty room with the only illumination arround coming from the window. I wanted to call her so badly but that would have been a dumb idea. Just imagine how Haruhi would react to a phone call this early in the morning. She would probably give me hel when I saw her the next time. Anyway, I got up and sat on the edge of my bed. I placed my hands on my face and tried desperately to clear my mind. My mind quickly becoming more restless by the second.

"If it wasn't real why do I feel this way?" I thought to myself. "It's just a nightmare. They don't have that much power over you. Or have I truly fallen this hard for her that even heartache she gives me in a fantasy realm in my mind hurts me in real life as well? It's just a really bad crush thats all. You aren't really falling in love with her right?"

Those questions raced through my mind as I slowly calmed down and my pulse went back to normal. I felt like Nagato with my mind arguing amongst itself like this. Each side trying to convince each other its right. I looked out the window and saw a dark bluish color. The sun had yet to rise and it was no surprise. It was still far too early in the morning for the sun to rise around here. The clock next to me read 5 in the morning exactly. Only 4 hours of sleep so far and I don't have to meet Haruhi until 10 in the morning, plenty of time to get some more rest as surely I'm going to need it for today. After all, it is a Saturday spent with the SOS Brigade. Knowing Haruhi shes going to have us all do something completely ridiculous like run a car wash or run around the city looking for anything paranormal.

"Haruhi…." I whispered her name as I laid back down onto my bed I hoping that the rest of my rest would be peaceful. Little did I know that my little nightmare would only be the beginning of a long day…

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**Well thats the end of Chapter 2! Hope I made the impression of losing it slowly quite well...**

**As always please read and review and Chapter 3 will be started on once I get some more feedback.  
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	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Sorry for the wait for this chapter. As usual please read and review. I hastily wrote through part of this chapter so I will inform everyone if I decide to rewrite parts of this down the line somewhere. With that said enjoy!**

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**Chapter 3: Long Day**

As I awoke that morning I found myself barely having the energy to get out of bed. Like instinct I glanced out the window to see it was a beautiful day. Sound of birds chirping and not a cloud in sight. Almost reminds me of those Saturday morning cartoons I used to watch as a kid. Continuing my typical routine once waking up, my eyes shifted towards the clock perched next to my bedside.

"Nine in the morning…great how am I going to get ready in an hour especially in this condition?" I said to myself.

I still haven't fully recovered from the emotional stress I experienced over the night and I planned to keep it private, making a promise to myself to not even reveal a sign of anything out of my usual personality. Rolling over on my side I sat up on the edge of my bed just as I did hours ago. Immediately, thoughts of Haruhi came into my mind.

"You're going to see her again today Kyon…" talking to myself in my thoughts to help straighten out my mind. "Don't act or say anything stupid. Try to do something to get her to talk to you as a friend not as a club leader."

I knew in my mind these goals were a wasted effort. Haruhi would be far too busy bossing around everyone to even care about anything I do. She sees me as just one of the group and not as an individual. To try and change her opinion of me would be of a high risk which I was not willing to take at that time.

Looking around my empty room I walked out to the hallway to hear the sounds of the TV. Remembering it was a Saturday I knew my sister would be up so early to watch cartoons. Before I met Haruhi, I forgot what mornings were during the weekends. There really was nothing better to do than sleep in so I did. Every week I would wake up not having any idea of what happened in the world that morning. Anyway enough of the rambling where was I?

"You sure are up early today brother!" My Sister exclaimed. "Did you want to watch TV with me?"

I almost wished that was the reason I'm awake right now.

"No I've got to meet up with the Brigade down at the station" I told her.

"What you gonna do with them?"

"I really have no idea…" my palm placed on my forehead as I opened the refrigerator to get some breakfast. "I never have any idea what is in store for the day which is what keeps things interesting" I explained to her

"How is it interesting if you don't know what you are gonna be doing?"

"This kid really asks far too many questions…." I thought to myself. "I just said it's interesting because it's like a surprise. Each day brings something new and keeps things fun." I told her.

"Ooooh…okay" she paused for a second before continuing the rest of her sentence. "Can I come with you?"

Besides the fact I didn't want her annoying self hanging around which would really drive me further insane I knew she would be begging me to take her somewhere if she got too bored.

"It's only for high schoolers." I said. "Little kids like you should stay home and watch cartoons or something"

"Who you calling little? I'm already in 3rd grade that's when our teacher says we should be responsible big kids!" she yelled out.

"Gah look. You can't come okay? I'll take you to the park or something tomorrow I promise."

"Fine….you always leave me out of the fun stuff"

Deciding to end the conversation right there I proceeded to eat breakfast. Only thing in the house that was good enough to eat was cereal that had gone stale. Trying to manage my time knowing it would take at least 20 minutes to reach the station I gulped down the rest of my meal as fast as I could. Walking back to my room to change into some street clothes I thought of what might catch Haruhi's attention. Realizing now that it would probably take me dressing up like a gorilla to even get her to notice me I just put on a generic shirt and pants. Dashing to my garage I went to grab my bicycle and I headed off.

As I rode out to the sidewalk of my house I heard the familiar ringtone of my phone. Checking to see who called me, my heart jumped a bit when I saw it was Haruhi calling me unexpectedly.

"Hello?" I answered trying not to sound so surprised at the sudden call.

"Where are you?! It's 5 minutes until 10!" she yelled

"I'm on my way there just give me a few minutes…"

"You better or theres going to be trouble when you get here!"

Sigh…I'm not even late yet and shes already on my case! There were very very few things I disliked about Haruhi, but her impatience was one of those things. I quickly rode faster as I headed to meet up with her.

By the time I arrived it was exactly 10 in the morning. I looked around the busy station and out of the crowd of people my eyes only focused on one person. I'm sure you all know by now who I was fixated on so I won't go into further detail. She looked absolutely beautiful though with her black jacket and skirt on. A smile came to my face as I saw hers as I walked toward her and the rest of the Brigade.

"Good morning Kyon!" Mikuru said happily as I got off my bike.

"It truly is a good morning isn't it?" As I heard the familiar voice of Koizumi. His trademark smile across his face. I always found it creepy to be honest.

"About time." Haruhi said. Not a sign of any joy to see me at all.

"Well I got here on time didn't I?" I said. I immediately regret how I chose to answer that.

"You can't talk that way to your leader!" she said scowling. "Besides, you were the last one here you might as well be late…"

"I'm sorry Haruhi. I'll be earlier next time." I said trying so hard to not sound hurt at her words. My smile still there but it was getting so hard to maintain. "What are we doing today?" I asked.

"Today the SOS Brigade will go around the city looking for anything unusual! I know we have done this before but that was months ago and who knows what changes might have happened in the short period of time!" Haruhi said excitedly. "I will be with Mikuru and Nagato while Kyon and Koizumi will be another group. Think of it like uhh a battle of the sexes to find anything to make it more interesting!"

Great…I get to spend a day with the creepy smiling fellow. Why couldn't she have chosen me? As we broke into our groups it was settled that Haruhi's group would take the east side of the city while mine would venture out into the west. I don't even know what Haruhi would consider unusual but I suppose I'll have to report something to her to keep her happy. The last thing I want is to her to think we all wasted a day doing nothing. The sun was shining bright and it was the hottest it had been in days. As we walked along a busy street we were silent. My mind was obviously thinking about Haruhi and Kozumi well…it was only a matter of time before he broke the silence.

"Its very hot today isn't it?" he asked me.

"Hm? Oh yeah it is…" I replied.

"What's on your mind? You seem spaced out today." His smile never fading while he asked that. Seriously how could a guy maintain smiling that long?

"Nothing. I'm just tired." I lied hoping he wouldn't make a guess.

"You like Haruhi don't you?" he said chuckling. Damn hes good at guessing! I was slightly annoyed at how he could say it with a chuckle but I let it go.

"What?! No how could you guess that?!" I replied sounding surprised.

"Well its not hard to notice how you try to meet her expectations and the fact your eyes always seem fixated on her. She sure doesn't seem to be returning those feelings huh?"

"Shut up…I don't want to discuss this with you." I answered. My face had a look of anger and sadness on it. It was true the fact she seems to not want anything to do with me was hurting me. I couldn't deny anymore how much I liked her. In my mind I could imagine just holding her in my arms hearing her say that she was happy to be with me. Just a stupid fantasy that I wish wouldn't play in my head as I feel a pain in my heart whenever it came to my mind.

"Well theres obviously no denying it now." He said. "Its fine if you don't want to talk about it. Just be careful when you are involved with her emotions. You don't want to endanger this world now."

"Whatever. Lets just fine something already." I said.

We walked around blocks and blocks of the city looking for anything unusual to no avail. We saw some trashcans tipped over but that was hardly unusual. Maybe it would be to Haruhi but I feared for her reaction if she thought it was nothing. Aw well she would get mad at me anyway if I said we found nothing so I might as well give it a shot.

We all met up at the station about 4 hours later. My stomach was growling seeing as we haven't eaten lunch yet. I realized that I forgot my wallet at home so I was completely broke as well.

"So did you two find anything?" Haruhi said. Her face looked as if she just wasted her morning and my heart started to race as I told her we found only some tipped over trashcans.

"That's all you found?! What the hell were you two doing all morning?! For all we know those could have just been tipped over by some kids or a wind or something! Is this your idea of a joke or something? Arrgh…what a waste of a day." Haruhi yelled at us. I could barely bring myself to even look at her. I stared downwards staying silent. I knew she was angry at the whole Brigade but it felt as if her anger was all directed towards me.

"I'm sorry Haruhi I didn't mean to waste your time like this." I said. My voice was barely above a whisper at this point.

"Whatever. All of you are dismissed for the day. I am in no mood to do anything else. I'll see you all in the clubroom on Monday." She said as she walked away. I wanted to say goodbye but I didn't want to make anything worse. The rest of the Brigade walked away as well. We didn't have much to say and we feared for any consequences of Haruhi's anger.

I started to ride my bike home and I thought of what happened today. I felt so bad for letting her down like this and seeing her angry. I cursed at myself as I arrived at home and went straight to my room. I was still hungry but it didn't matter to me at that point. I sat down on my bed and placed my hands on my face as I looked down.

"Damnit…" I said to myself. I could feel my eyes start to water as I tried to stop myself from crying. A single tear managed to escape as I regained my composure and went downstairs to eat some lunch. I desperately tried to get my mind off of Haruhi as I sat down on the couch and watched TV. Another slow day and I feared for the long night I was sure to have later. I hated how I knew it wouldn't be an easy night to get through…

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**A/N: Well that's the end of this chapter. Chapter 4 might be in a few weeks due to the winter holidays but I will write bits and parts of it in my spare time. Happy Holidays everyone!**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Lying in bed that night I didn't even know how I was feeling anymore. That bitter stinging pain in my heart still lingered and my mind was completely restless. My mind obviously focused on Haruhi. The scenes from today repeatedly played over and over and I was growing angrier at the fact I was completely incompetent today and I'm screwing up my chances of getting her to fall for me. I'm no stranger to knowing about repeating painful things, I mean I have to climb up that giant hill everyday just to get to school but this was a pain on a far different level. Why did today have to play out this way? I imagined what it would have been like had I satisfied Haruhi's demands for today. In my mind I pictured her smiling and excited as she rewarded us all with some food. Truly how I loved the fact fantasies help escape you from reality.

Checking the clock I realized I had been just lying in bed for nearly an hour. My hands placed on the back of my head as I stared upwards into the ceiling. With the only light being the miniscule amount of light shining through from my window there really was not much else to look at. Guess having one night of little sleep won't hurt me. After all, tomorrow was Sunday and Haruhi had given us a day off from doing anything club related. Maybe a day without seeing her would help to ease my mind. I tried to think about something else other than her but it was a wasted effort. It felt like if I tried thinking about something completely unrelated I would always end up finding a way to relate it to her. This can't be normal can it? My frustration building at my inability to occupy my mind and the anger I felt from failing Haruhi earlier brought about a sudden burst of anger within me.

"Damnit!" I cursed loudly as I punched my bed. "Why does it have to be like this?! Why do I have to screw up the things I always try to do?!" I thought to myself. Of course I may have snapped for a second but I still kept that bit of sense not to shout at this time of night.

Luckily for me I snapped out of this state pretty fast. What am I doing? Calm down Kyon whats done is done. Right can't change what has happened. I missed you there for a second logic!

I forced myself to just close my eyes and try to sleep. After quite a bit of a battle, I finally did end up asleep. To my amazement the rest of my night was not filled with nightmares or anything. Just sleep. No dreams or nightmares simply plain old sleep.

As I awoke that morning the first thing that came to my mind was, well take a guess. The first thing that came to my mind wasn't to check the time or anything else like that but rather Haruhi. Instantly I thought of if she was already awake and what she was doing right now. Why would it matter though? I'm sure shes probably happy not having to see me at all today. Just minutes into this new day and I was already feeling depressed.

Sluggishly walking to my kitchen I was surprised to find out my sister was still asleep. Guess when theres no cartoons to look forward to kids just sleep until noon. Grabbing myself some bread I sat down on my couch and turned on the TV. There really was nothing to watch but I wanted to get my mind off of her any way possible. I stopped on a baseball game but instantly changed it after remembering the time Haruhi made the whole Brigade join up to play baseball. Damn how I hate having a mind that links memories like this.

I quickly finished eating and decided to just go for a walk outside. Putting on my shoes I opened the door and felt the nice morning breeze. It was another beautiful day and with it still being pretty early the heat was tolerable. As I walked down my sidewalk I saw a bunch of kids playing in the street and I couldn't help but look. Further down the street I saw what looked like a couple around my age. I stopped instantly and stared blankly at them from a distance. As you probably guessed by now I started to think about you know who again. I pictured me and her holding hands like they were and her beautiful face was smiling at me. My expression instantly becoming more depressed looking as I frowned and felt that stinging pain in my heart once again. I continued walking towards the heart of the city. My face still bearing my depressed expression I knew it would bring unwanted attention to me. But truly at that point I couldn't care less about what people felt about me. Seeing a bunch of businessmen talking on their phones looking busy and random pedestrians with a smile on their face I kept walking on by. No destination in mind or anything but this walk was doing the opposite of what I had hoped it would do. There was no denying it at this point that this was more than a mere crush, Hell I love Haruhi and it appeared clear as day to me. Unlike most guys who were just awestruck by her beauty it's her personality that won me over. Her eccentric, energetic, nothing-can-stop-me attitude I just loved it. Sure she could be bossy and kind of heartless but still. Something about her captivates my heart and holds it prisoner. Along with her beautiful face, hair and well, everything about her was beautiful to me. Her sweet smile being able to uplift my mood no matter how far it had fallen.

Turning back towards my house it took much shorter getting back than it was getting to wherever I went. Probably because I didn't stop to stare at all the people on my return trip. As I went back inside I headed straight for my room and did something I would never find myself doing on a weekend. I ended up working on my summer work. Actually worked on getting my mind off of her too. Being productive instead of moping around for a day was the smartest idea I had in awhile. I spent a good chunk of my day working and the rest of the day was surprisingly not Haruhi related. Just a lazy Sunday afternoon filled with TV and homework. As long as I could keep myself occupied I wouldn't have to worry about my thoughts getting the best of me.

The next day I woke up doing the same thing as I did the day before which was instantly think of Haruhi. Realizing I would see her again today I felt a mix of excitement and a bit of sadness. Excitement that I could see her again and sadness at knowing she probably doesn't want to see me at all and the fact she doesn't even return anything close to resembling my feelings for her. Still, if I didn't face her I would never improve my relationship with her and I was basically obligated to show up always. Thinking about what we would do today I wondered if Haruhi would be in a good mood.

Walking up that huge hill under an overcast sky I headed towards the far too familiar school. Being empty due to the summer holidays we were lucky enough to still have some rooms open for the clubs. Walking around I saw a bunch of tennis and baseball players doing stretches in the fields. Guess it was time for their practices to begin. Anyway when I finally got to the clubroom I was surprised to only to find one person there. Yep, you guessed it, that one person here? It was Haruhi and I saw a facial expression of hers I had never seen before and instantly my heart felt like it skipped multiple beats and my eyes widened.

"Kyon...we need to talk"

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**A/N: Hopefully you all enjoy the cliffhanger for now! I'll try to have Chapter 5 up in about 2 weeks but I've been busy lately. As always, hope you all enjoyed the chapter and please review!**


	5. Chapter 5

I stared blankly at the girl in front of me. Haruhi and I alone in the clubroom with her telling me we needed to talk? At that point it felt as if my heart was about to jump out of my body since it was beating so hard. My mouth started to become dry and my palms began to sweat profoundly.

Alone in a room with Haruhi? And of all things she wants to talk to me? This could either be a glorious dream or the start of a terrible nightmare. I hoped it wasn't the latter.

"A-about what?" I stuttered out, still taking in the magnitude of the situation.

"I want to know why you've been acting so different lately." She demanded. As if my heart wasn't beating fast enough now it felt like it was going to explode. I had to think fast. No way was I going to tell her I liked her now especially like this. It was time to smooth talk my way out of this!

"How have I been acting differently?" I asked trying to play dumb.

"You've been quieter and I don't know you just seem really off lately. As Brigade leader I demand to know what is up with all of my subordinates!"

And in that instant I saw a side of Haruhi I never seen before. Was she actually caring about me or is this something different? I was feeling so confused. A mix of happiness, fear, sadness and excitement flowed within me.

"Well….you see…" Damnit time to think of a lie fast! I never expected to be placed in a situation like this.

"Well? Tell me already!"

"Haruhi I…I've been trying to be a better subordinate and I just keep failing and its getting to me. I don't want to disappoint you." Well that was a real reason but not the main reason. I need a pat on the back for thinking about saying that right on the spot.

"Is that it? That shouldn't be a good enough reason to get you down." She replied in a calm voice. She actually cares about me? This is was way too good to be true…

"Well yeah that's it." I said in a quiet voice. I couldn't shake the feeling she knew there was more to this. Like she had an instinct of reading people through their words and emotions. She is a goddess after all so I wouldn't be surprised then if that were the case.

"I see. Maybe I should ease up a bit then. Even less work will be accomplished around here if people were in as bad of a mood as you are." She said. "Could you do me a favor?"

"Of course." I replied wondering what she had in mind.

"Could you tell me whats wrong instead of hiding it? I'm your friend Kyon, don't hide things from me." She told me.

I don't believe it. Haruhi considers me as her friend? Such an odd way to show friendship but I'm not going to complain. I'm on the right track to winning her over and I didn't even realize it. Maybe if I play my cards right from here I can win her heart over!

"Alright. I could easily do that" I answered. Trying to not sound excited over the fact she said I was her friend.

"It's such a nice day out today. Want to go for a walk?" She asked. I didn't believe at how much better this is turning out. She wants to go for a walk? With me? No way this can be true. Is this an elaborate trick or something? Aw stop analyzing this so deep Kyon! The girl of your dreams invited you to walk with her so don't think too deeply into it!

"Sure I'll go for a walk with you" My eyes lit up as much and my excitement at that point started to show.

Haruhi gave me an awkward looking stare for a moment. Apparently people shouldn't be this excited about going for a walk.

"Lets just go around the school. I don't feel like going too far."

"That's fine by me." My composure going back to normal.

We went outside of the club room and out of the doors leading to the courtyard. The warm summer breeze blew past us and it was the greatest feeling I've felt in so long. The beautiful girl walking right beside me. For once it felt like there was nothing else in this world. Just me and Haruhi together for a few moments. Nothing could have ruined this moment. The world could have been ending at that point and I would have been at peace. For one short walk around the school she was mine and I was hers. What could have been better?

We passed by the classrooms still locked and freshly cleaned for the summer. The smell of fresh cut grass filled the air. I couldn't believe I was saying this but it was beautiful. I considered a school beautiful? Now I know I'm losing it from love.

"It's quite warm today." Haruhi said suddenly.

"Hm? Oh yeah it is." I answered. Trying to draw on an interesting topic to converse on.

"Did the other Brigade members wonder why they were being sent home today?" I asked.

"Nope. They wouldn't dare question their leader." She replied. Her pride bursting through her words. She really did love being leader. Now if only she could love me…

"Well few people would question you" I laughed.

"That's true and I wouldn't have it any other way." She replied with a smile. Her smile filled my heart with joy. To know I was making her happy made me the happiest man in the world.

We passed by the commons, the baseball fields, around the parking lot and now we were headed back to the club room. I didn't want this walk to end. I would have walked with her to hell and back. I didn't care as long as she was with me. At that point I truly believed she would be with me someday. I opened the doors for her leading back to the room and we both sat down after our walk.

"Well that was fun" I said.

"Yeah it was." She replied. Not as happy as I expected her to sound but still happy sounding.

"Haruhi have you ever wondered about the future?" I had no idea what came over me but I was about to do something I never found myself having the courage to do.

"Sometimes. Why you ask?" She answered.

"Oh just wondering. It's fun to think about all the changes that will happen. All the different people and how your relationships with people you know change. The future changes a lot of things."

"Well I knew that." I just hinted to her that I liked her and I didn't even know why I did it. She probably got the hint but she didn't say anything about it.

"Well I should be headed home." Haruhi said. "Cmon Kyon go home as well."

"Alright its been a good day Haruhi."

"Yeah I know but hurry up already I want to lock the door."

As I started my traverse back home I was all smiles. This day went so much better than I could ever expect. Haruhi considering me as a friend and going for a walk with her? Ah if I could only relive this day over and over. If only I knew then that my world would come crashing down faster than it went sky high.

* * *

**A/N: Well thanks for reading and as always leave a review. Nearing the halfway point of the story and lets just say it's not going to be very happy.**


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